Snow Day

Don’t laugh.

I have many friends in snowy climes who think our reluctance to deal with cold weather here in the South is silly. They are used to driving in snow, and perhaps ice, and laugh when we have closures or delayed starts due to the potentiality of “inclement” weather.

I don’t agree with my learned friends. To the contrary I think it is silly to attempt to put a lot of Southerners on the road during a snow day. We don’t know how to drive in the snow. What’s more, we don’t want to learn how to drive in the snow. That’s why we live here.

And I’m sorry, but no one knows how to drive on ice. If you are not wearing skates, don’t get on the ice.

Having said all that I want to turn to the work being done – or not done – on a snow day or delayed start. Unlike school, a snow day isn’t a day off. Its a day when you either work from home, or come into the office a little later.

Here are silly things you can do (other than attempt to drive on ice) that will cement your reputation as a slacker.

  • Announce to everyone how bad the roads were to explain why you came in after the designated start time: they all used the same roads and know there is little if any traffic
  • Show up after lunch and then announce you will be leaving for lunch. I don’t care what your “standard” lunch hour is: if we close the office until one, you had plenty of time to eat before you got here. Twice
  • Bitch about the decision-making process that [now] requires you to work a half a day as opposed to having the whole day off. Uh, if we could afford to let you take an entire day off maybe we don’t really need your position
  • Bitch about not getting a personal phone call/txt/email telling you when to come in: uh, that’s what we have a website for. Look it up
  • Cry about having to leave early “before the roads get bad.” If its 32 or above, they are not getting bad, they are getting wet. You can handle wet – we’ve seen you do it

No employer wants to risk the health and safety of their team. Yet, when the immediate danger is past its easy to see people fall into one of two camps: the serious ones trying to take care of business, and the slackers who will leverage any disruption to do less work.

Bad weather can illuminate a lot about character and work ethic.

Slackers are about as useful as ice on the roadway: we don’t need any of them either.

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